John, Israel and his little brother...and me. You can't even imagine.


I can't even type lmao

                I can't write alot at the moment because I have to run to class in about four minutes. So yea, I'm back from summer vacation. I don;t have internet, like i said in the beginning, so I can only update when internet is near bye. 

                    Lots of shit happend and I'll lightly update later, I'm not wanting to go into full detail and aspect that happend over these past few monthes.


I can say one thing for sure. I should have went camping....

I cut off all my hair...well...not all of it. most of it. All my friends with long hair think i'm going insane...
                                            ...they don't know half of it.


So my mom now might have uterus cancer....great. Oh, and my grandfather is back in the hospital, probably gunna die soon...



can someone hand me the whiskey, i need to take my aspirin.(jk)

                        I hate being sick and being at school all at the same time. It just makes the whole thing harder to live with. I just wish I could go back to bed or atleast not be here.
                    Mr Roth (favorite & best teacher ever) isn't here so I'll have to deal with some stupid sub, that even the security guards are making fun of. And right now, I'm supposed to be Mr Scott's T.A, but i can't stand him anymore and plus I can't find him so w.e.


I want tea with honey =[


-sweet
   not feeling as such.

Sorry for my delay. I've been sick and not able to get to a computer lately...


            Okay so nothing completely exciting has happend in my week off...the Guy I was talking about (the older one) still likes me and I still have to stay away and that makes it even harder. He gave me a cool little clear stone and we talked a little about the situation...we both want to be with eachother...


I hate my life sometimes.

I'm just frustrated...
I don't even know what to post, really, just because what I want to write about I might get into trouble for..(by friends)  
   Basically...In a nut shell...I'm attracted to someone who is quite a few years older than  myself. I've always been attracted to older people, I don't always act on the feelings, but I'm attracted. 
                                               And here's why I may get into trouble..I want to act on my feelings.
I'm thinking waaaaaaaaaaaaaay to much about what I want to do and it's making me so ancy that I can feel my skin move....

He has shown interest back but like I said...the age gap is huge and just to be honest with myself...I think I'm to immature for him. I still love being a kid once in a while. I love randomly tackling my friends or getting into wrestling matches in the dirt....he's a man.


I'm still a kid.

Okay usually I read alot of horror/romance novels but last week I picked up this new book in my school library. It was called Blood Brothers. No it's not a vampire novel but it's a really great short novel. It's got a really twisted feeling about it. secrets, fights and brain bleedings.

Anyways since I finsihed the book, I've been thinking about volunteering at hospital and working my way up to be an intern.

I'll write more later. I'm looking up stuff at the moment.

In redwood city
at a friends house chillaxin
stuck here till tomorrow cause dad is a douche bag. =/


live, rock and smoke.

So I just got back to school from Spring break. My week was pretty fun.
I did a lot of mushrooms, smoked alot of weed and drank with my "homies" lol

                 I can honestly say, this easter is one easter I shall never forget.
My friends and I refused to let Park Rangers and Police take our PIRATE FLAGS. One of my sisters got taken to jail though which is a huge bummer. If I can I'll get some pictures because this shit was crazy! The fucking rangers ripped off her shirt as they tackled her to the ground and she's only 19! and a FEMALE at that!

My family stood around the Janice tree and formed a human baracade basically. My eldest sister that I listen to the most, told me to help but not to get around the tree because I'm still a lil to young. I'm the Baby Sister. I'm so proud of the though! They all stood their ground and didn't go down without a fight. 
                    In the end 2 family members went to the clink and we did end up taking the flag down just so the police wouldn't take them for good. But I do guarantee they'll be waving today when I walk into that park.


-sweet

IRISH PARTY TONIGHT!!!!

                         Some words of advice: 
                                       If you ever have kids and don't know where to enroll them at school at, don't pick SFUSD Your kid will probably kill themself within the first 2 years if they are, by any means, open minded.

My fucking school district is giving me shit for having excessive absences but here's the thing. I have had a 2.86 GPA all year, except for this last report card, but I still got above a 2.00. My mom thinks that if this keeps happening then she's going to have to do jail time. (Is that true? btw) I can't even mention school without her getting all crazy now. And my attendence leiazon (or however the fuck you spell it) is a fat unfair bitch! Just because your fucking kid fucked up once, is a star student and you can't get a man/woman doesn't mean you have to be a fucking cunt towards me. 
                        I'm ready to burn down the school, even though I couldn't pull it off...I want to. I would mak sure everyone was out first! I'm not a murderer...just a little crazy. I just want out of the school district, after 3 years of the B.S, I'm a bit exhausted. Excuse me for my ranting, but then again....I don't care right now.

Sounds like a bad movie title starring Freddie Prince Junior. =P


This weekend was...interesting.
                  Friday: Got drunk at friends' house with more friends. Watched Youtube videos. Passed out.
                  Saturday: Slightly hungover. Go to Hippie Hill. Hang out there for a bit, get stoned. Go home and watch movies.
                   Sunday: Take exctacy. Don't really trip to much. bummer. Smoke alot of pot. pass out watching Harry Potter: Goblet of Fire.
                   Monday(currently):Stoned. In library. thinking about this weekend.
 

See...interesting...Interestingly boring. I started thinking all dark when I peeked on my pill. I kept thinking "I'm gunna die someday. no matter how I try to fight it. I am going to die someday...and I'm scared to find out how."
I don't want to die. But I'm human...we're put on this earth to die. We're born, some of us grow up and then we die. End of story.
         I think that's maybe why I love the idea of Vampires. Immortal, everlasting...but that's the hollywood vamp.

I'm really high...I'll write later. I'm thinking too much.

I want to write but I have nothing to write about really, well, more like I don't have the passion at the moment to realy get into anything. I'm just going to summarize.

Okay so..
Febuary 27, I became someone's girlfriend. His name is Zach Daniels. =] He's 19 and from Hippie hill. I'm starting to really like this punk lol.

Drama with friends and their problems, so that's nothing new.

Like i said, nothing to interesting. Write later.

-sweet.

Okay I guess it's not a huge deal if I like my friends' older brother but it's just kinda...odd feeling. I think I'm actually starting to develop feelings for him but I don't think that their mutual. I've hung out with him by myself now except his friend was there. He's 19 and I'm only 16, is that still considered illegal? It's only three year difference....hmm.

I don't know. I'm pretty out of it at the moment, I smoked a bowl before I left my house this morning. =]  I'll write more later. Right now I'm just looking at cool black and white pictures.

I think I have a crush on my friends' older brother...





FUCK.

                            It's funny how something so beautiful and fragile looking...could kill you in a matter of minutes. -Yes, I'm reading the Novel, White Oleander. And I recommend it to any young women who is a little self-doubting. The mother and daughter in this book are phanomenal. I'm in love with the plot and the characters of Astrid and Ingrid. Ingrid is like an Oleander. She's beautiful and fragile but can be deadly. Lethal.

If I were to kill someone, I think I'd use the technique she did.
           Kill them with Kindess. 
                            Well...Oleander sap.
I have nothing really to talk about. I'm feeling kind of blah today. I'm not mad, sad or anything negative but nor am I feeling happy or anything positive. I feel...hollow? Is that the word? I don't know. I'm gunna go read or something. Write more later. I probably will have something to write about after 5th period.

I don't get it why people are assholes to people they don't know. 

     Okay so I posted a entry on this community called PSIVampires and I told them whats been going on and asked for a little advise. But I guess this other person felt compelled to tell me that not only am I not a vampire but I'm also a bad person.

If said person is reading this...

            SUCK MY COCK =].
Okay...I just needed to say/write it =D

So I got a hair cut yesterday and omg...I can't believe how much healthier my hair feels. I have a tendancy to fuck with my hair A LOT. I've dyed my hair over ten times in les than about three or four years. My mom says it's a sign of insanity...I say it's just me wanting something different to look at. =]
               Well...I have nothing really to talk about so I'll write more later.

Till it be morrow. X]

      This weekend was very...interesting. I went down to RedwoodCity to see my best friend and my dad.
Now, my dad is a closet meth user and hasn't paid child support in more than ten years so your probably wondering by now, "why would I want to go see him?"
    I've come to one conclusion about my dad. He's a douche. Always has been, always will be. But even though he's a douche, he gave me a little brother, Justice. Justice is going to be 7 this September. He and I are ten years and six days apart...great timing dad. ;) My little brother is the only thing that keeps me going, that makes me want to do good so he can want to do good when he's older. Already though from what I can see, he's turning into a mini of my dad. =P not good.

Well I'm chatting with a friend now so I'll continue later.


OH!! And my dad gave me a Polaroid Camera. WOOOO!